we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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