Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize