booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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