Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
