Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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