We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
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At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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