Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
you made out with another girl for some wings
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize