Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
