if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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