At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
