I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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