He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
