brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
