I am puke
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
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I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
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Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You are a genius and a whore.
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