And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
