A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Dicks are not precious.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
