You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
