We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
