We're like a lot better than the average bears
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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