you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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