idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize