Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
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You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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