Kiss
Puke
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No subtext here. People are naked.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize