My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
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We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
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