He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
