i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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