you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
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