THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
