I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
