I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Randomize
