so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
