i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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