There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
