i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize