She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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