it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
