we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I have post one night stand depression
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
