You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
