I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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