Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
