Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
