I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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