Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
