party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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