I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I have feelings that need drinking.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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