he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
