this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
