people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
