the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
