Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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