omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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